11 thoughts on “Hate mail returns. Jesus Doesn’t.

  1. Julius

    Oh, I’d take hate mail over Jesus any day! Cuz if he ever came back, boy wouldn’t I feel silly (or would I?)! On the real Rapture Day (re-scheduled for October, I think), maybe I’d just sit there and wail/gnash my teeth while all my celibate/stoic Sunday-morning-sacrificing friends all ascended, thumbing their nose at me… I’d be like “Neuoooo!! why, oh, WHY didn’t I believe that ridiculous story!?” Then I’d be like… well at least I don’t have to deal with assholes knocking on my door for at least a few more months until the world implodes and I get to spend an eternity in hell…

    Oh, yeah… none of that shit’s gonna happen anyway. It’s just a lie to get gullible people to hand over their money to sociopathic weasels running the show. Those disappointed by Jesus’ failed attempt to show up must be quite humiliated, but humility is considered a virtue in their Buy-bull so it wouldn’t surprise me if they come back for Round 3 in October, Round 4 next year and so on until they end up penniless on the streets still confused why this damn Rapture ain’t gonna happen. I mean, that guy sounded so convincing and he’s a… a… CIVIL ENGINEER for Crissake!

  2. Mikey

    It’s a good thing that the rapture didn’t happen, so true believers like Andres can keep bitch slapping heathens, or whatever other mysogynistic christian practices they follow.

    Now Camping says that he just miscalculated (again). I guess that it was a mathematical mistake which led him to believe in rolling earthquakes, one time zone at a time. Perhaps he misplaced a decimal point somewere, which led to the obvious conclusion that all corpses would be thrown out of their graves, and those of the non-saved would be “shamed”, as if being thrown out of their graves wasn’t shame enough.

    It’s interesting that Camping spent the night in a motel rather than at his church. The bastard knew!

  3. Apostate Lois

    Congratulations on having steady business, Bob. I love it when people ask, “How can you do this to your Lord and Savior, who DIED for you that you might have eternal life??” The answer is, “Because there’s money in it.” If Jesus’ feelings are not hurt by lying, cheating, conniving telepreachers making a mockery of his name every day, then obviously he won’t be offended by a few dress-up magnets. In fact, he seems to be financially blessing you for it! Praise Sweet Jesus, in his tutu and fuzzy slippers!

  4. maria

    all the religions have one concept love forgiveness humanity ,,god is the son of our glory lord and they are one .he was sent when all the people where leaving in sins ,,he came and died for us to save us to tell us that if u love forgive and sacrifice u are in the good way it’s not a fairytale or something it’s a reality .he always called the good and what this site is doing is calling people by bad so if u are wise enough u will choose u’re free but u don’t have the right to do this ..at least respect ur brothers and sisters…and wt do u believe ur money is the leader or wt all what we are living on earth is material the true happiness is next to god,next to jesus and next to maria,u can see all the miracles happening ,,glory glory to our lord

  5. Aaron

    @Maria

    I would say all religions do have a few concepts in common, war, conquest, suppression of women, supression of homosexuals, submission to an imaginary overlord, death penalty for more or less everything (including arguing with your parents)

    But im sure you know all this, I mean afterall you HAVE read the Bible, Koran etc………..have you not?

  6. Thackerie

    From Maria’s post, I gather that fundies DO have a preferred writing style: such poor grammar as to be incomprehensible and the inability to spell out really big words like y-o-u. Oh well, at least she avoided the fundie fondness for RANDOM capitalization which adds sooooooo much to understanding.

  7. Steven Bently

    Maria, out of these two statements which one is most likely to be true?

    A. Nature went out of it’s way and virgin birth is possible.

    B. Someone told a lie.

  8. Demonhype

    Inspired Incoherence–the preferred fundie language/dialect. Perhaps only those with “wisdom”, on whom the Glorious Light of Jesus Christ has shone, can make out the meaning. Kind of makes it hard to try and convert all those unwashed heathens though, since all we can hear is “garble garble, blah blah” and occasionally something that almost (but not quite) sounds like it might be English. I guess it’s from the traditions of most prophets and holy men, wherein the more garbled and insane the message, the more it engenders belief. Kind of like how Brian only got all those followers when he started shrieking a bunch of random insanity.

    Well, that and the fact that he ended on a high note. “To them only shall be given….shall…be….given….” As the Brain so astutely noted, nothing rouses humanity more than the promise of free t-shirts.

  9. Trogo

    I am so delighted to read these letters; it brightens my day when I see the incoherent gibberish that spews from these people. I suppose if I decide to become a bigot some day, I will take up religion. Last thought, it is even more delightful to see such blatant hypocrisy visible to all but the hypocrite, e.g. “I dont understand your concept- unless Muslim.” written by lilevilchick201. She must be the anti-christ, her name has the word “evil” in it!

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