The Network of Wishers are being called into action!
And they've got a cool chant!

Their letters will be in blue while mine are in black and white.


Network Of Wishers Warrior Kitten:
"My biggest wish is to be in Bob's pants"

ATTENTION!
They have been alerted to our Network Of Wishers and've declared war! The ultimate psychic battle in the cosmos has begun!

This is no joke. Yesterday evening I received the following email from Eric Johnson, the leader of The Network Of Prayers Warriors and he has scheduled an emergency meeting for tomorrow, Sunday the 5th of December!

Here is the email I received from him just hours after posting the news about the Network Of Wishers.

December 3rd,2004
Subject: Prayer Network for Normal Bob Smith

"O Lord God of Israel, there is no God like you in all of heaven and earth. You are the God who keeps his kind promises to all those who obey you. And who are anxious to do your will."
--2 Chronicles 6:14 TLB

Christians,
You're receiving this email because you've corresponded with "Normal Bob Smith" within the last few months at his site. This Sunday, December 5th I
wish to organize a prayer offense to help lead Bob out of his sin. You may be an experienced prayer warrior or not; what matters to God is that we are sincere. At 8:00PM EST I will begin my prayer and encourage everyone in this email to do the same in sync.

Please send this out to as many Christians as possible. If you have prayer groups in your church, organize an emergancy meeting. Together we can all
help Bob overcome the spiritual warfare that keeps him in bondage to darkness. He thinks this is a joke; let's show him how great God's love is!

Throw in some prayer for Bob's followers, especially the Superchicks. If you've not seen just how dangerous Bob's theology can be, check it out here.

In Christ's Love,
Eric Johnson
werewolferic@canwetalk.com

I did not plan on our fight coming so soon, but I beg you Wisher Warriors, to put on your wishing hats and wish like you've never wished before!

I have to admit that I'm genuinely worried because they got that kick ass chant to start off their letter with. The ""O Lord God of Israel, there is no God like you in all of heaven and earth yadda yadda yadda. " one. So if any of you have a cool chant we could say before our wishing I'd totally appreciate you sending it in to me. I think it'd be a BIG help.

At 8pm, Sunday the 5th I, Normal Bob Smith the Leader of the Network Of Wishers, will begin my wishing and I encourage all of you (especially the Super Chics- whom they fear most!) to get in your Wishing Hats and combat the weapons of prayer they've wielded against us.

And, Wishers, if you don't hear from me in a few days and the site disappears then that probably will mean that their Prayer Transmissions defeated our Wish Transmissions in the outer cosmos battlefield. I would ask however that you keep the Network Of Wishers in tact and elect a new leader if I'm turned to the side of the Network Of Prayers.

Our struggle is a courageous one, and we will not rest until all wear the homemade paper hats like the ones we've scotch taped together so proudly.



Super Chic Rancid

“remember me telling you to stop. Because god is going to replay this to you on Juudgment day.”

Their Will be a day that you will have to answer to him for what you are doing? So stop it now that you have a chance, befor you go to a place of gashing of teeth and nothing but darkness, for all of your life it will never stop. If you think its not true you will remember me telling you to stop. Because god is going to replay this to you on Juudgment day.That day is verry verry soon.

Jennifer
administrator@form-cove.com


“the ACLU probably funds this junk.”

I was  kind of wondering.  I mean you mocked Jesus so well and all.  And it has been some time since this was all started with the dress up Jesus.  Where is the Buddah, or the Ghandi the HIndu Cow and many, many other's you could mock?  How about a Louis Farkhan?  I know why.  Because you would get ridiculed for it.  It's easier just to mock Jesus because the ACLU probably funds this junk.

John


Nope, it has nothing to do with whether or not I'd get ridiculed. Do you think I don't get ridiculed for mocking Jesus Christ? What planet are you on? The reason I chose Jesus is because His stories aren't for real. Gandhi, Farrakhan, Buddha, and even cows don't claim to be God, or live in a world of talking donkeys, raising from the dead and floating up into heaven, and the devil down below in hell. I mean Christ, you send your thoughts into another dimension for your Creator to listen to? For God's sake, grow the fuck up.

And I'm proud to say that this art project has been entirely funded by me. Oh, and Urban Outfitters (they buy lots of my Jesus Dress Up magnets).

May I have a picture of you to post with your email?
Thank you for your inquiry,
Bob


“I wasn't ridiculing you.”

Wow.  You cuss me out and then tell ME to grow up? That's interesting.  All I did was ask you where the other's were.  Everybody is so bold on the internet.  I wasn't ridiculing you.  But I find it strange for you to pick Jesus that's all.  I mean him not being real he sure gets the hate for the past 2, 000 years for not being real.  He sure is getting downplayed and out of songs and not being able to be mentioned in schools for not being real.  Some Jews complained and was worried about a certain movie being anti-semitic for not being real. 

Anyway,  Jesus actually doesn't even hate for doing that.  Heck I don't even hate you.  I just ran across your website by accident looking for something else and it just struck about howcome you didn't have other magnets.  Like Mohammad who did claim he was a god. 

I won't bother you anymore. Peace.
John


Wait, you called my site "junk" right? As in "the ACLU probably funds this junk?" Everyone is SO bold on the internet!

"All I did was ask you where those other people's dress up pages were! Wah wah wah!" (Me mocking you now.)

I'm SO sorry John! Were you innocently requesting that Gandhi dress up page to play around with? Oh gosh John, I don't understand how on earth I could have misread your email! I'm so so SO sorry! You see, when you made the statement that I wouldn't do your list of dress up pages because I'd get ridiculed I took that as a jab! I didn't realize that you were just trying to be polite, all puppy-eyed and all.

Are you seriously trying to say that Jesus is real because lots of people talk about Him today? That's the evidence you're presenting? Um, John, just because there's a huge following that does not make Him real. Or does your "theory" also apply to every god talked about by more than, let's say, a thousand people? The Satanic Verses sure stirred up a lot of people for Allah not to be real, huh John?

John, I know that Jesus doesn't hate me for doing this because He DIED two THOUSAND years before the internet even existed! Or is He looking down on the web from atop His fluffy cloud? I swear sometime you people act like freakin' third graders. As you can see I toned down the cuss words to accommodate delicate virgin eyes.

Oh, and Mohammed was a prophet, not a god, you dunderhead.
Bob


“...mine was more neutral.”

Hello Bob.  I said I wouldn't bother you again.  So, if I am I apologize.  I know you were so generous as to put my email upon your website and all.  Even though it wans't exactly hate mail.  I have read many of them and I would have to say mine was more neutral.  But that is not why I'm e-mailing.  I could care less you put my email up.  But I am bothered by is you put my whole name and email address with it.

So, I ask you kind sir, Bob.  To please remove those.  You can leave John.  But you see I have recived some very hateful things from Normal Bob friends.  And I actually do not deserve that.  I mean, seriously.  I didn't send you that kind of email.  The least you could do is remove what I have asked. 

John


You John, are the most pathetic kind of person there is. First you email me, calling my site junk, accusing me of fearing ridicule, or something, then you completely wimp out and say that you were just trying to ask me an innocent question! For God's sake John, take a stance! Defend what you believe! If you think it's junk stand by that! You don't have to back down just because I respond boldly.

And now, to top it all off you don't want to even be associated with your words anymore! And you're saying that you were neutral on the whole thing? That's so pathetic and dull! Your first email was the closest you came to showing any courage and opinion and you can't seem to run fast enough away from it.

Are you now denying that you called my site junk, or that your suggestions of Buddha, Gandhi, the HIndu Cow, and Louis Farrakhan was sarcasm? C'mon John! You were better off calling it junk and condemning me for not being more dangerous than you are now cowering from your own words.

Stand behind your beliefs or shut the fuck up!

Bob
PS. I have removed your email address and last name from the letters you wrote. You've really made an impression on us all.

“go to he doudle hockey sticks”

how can u make fun of jesus crist he died 4 u'r sins u'r  selfish go to he doudle hockey sticks

Lori Castranova
lcastrano@xxxxx.com


o g, u no ur a b ceez! u reelly need 2 werk mor on ur complaint letters wen u d fend g sus crist 4 n e 1 2 c u 4 1 2 b afrade of. may b u shood try going 2 skool b 4 u b 2 dum? if u rnt then u jus r b ing sil e 4 ur god n i m 1 2 c he no like dat.

Bob

 

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