Check this - Me with Russian playwright Anton Chekov!

Their letters will be in blue while mine are in black and white
.


Okay, I admit it. I'm an illiterate tool who knows nothing about Anton Chekov, or any Russian playwrights for that matter. I only kinda recognized the name, and when Skater Bob and I saw "him" at Union Square I tried to act like a big shot pretending I was familiar with him. How was I supposed to know that he died a hundred years ago? And besides, I was just tryin' to get him to pose with my magnets because I thought it'd be a neat thing to do. I didn't even buy a book for Chrise-sake, well, Bob did, but whatever. He said it wasn't a very good, and that'd make sense since it was all a big hoax. And for the record I didn't give him a set of magnets, I think.


Skater Bob

Still, he was a fucking charming bastard with a strong presence, especially for a dupe. If I'da known what they were up to I'd've easily given them a free set. The fact that they got him up and speaking at Barnes & Noble; priceless. [Read all about it here] That's the true victory. Not fooling some Christ-hating web master and his sidekick at Union Square. You see, I'd just met John Waters like a week earlier and I figured I was on some kind of roll or something! "sigh" They should be ashamed, clever swines.


Me with the real John Waters, I swear!

So we, Skater Bob and I, were sitting there at Union Square and they had this table set up with posters and a line of people and everything! I saw a sign that said "Meet Anton Chekov author of The Cherry Orchard" or something to that extent, and kinda sarcastically I pointed to it and said to Bob, "Hey, that's Anton chekov" like I was well read in Russian plays, and Bob said, "Go get your picture taken with him!"

So we went and got in line, I asked him to pose with them, and in a very jolly guffaw he delighted in doing just that. They really found the perfect guy to pull this off. In a convincing Russian accent (mind you I wouldn't be able to tell a convincing Russian accent from an unconvincing Russian accent if my life depended on it) and joked about crime in New York City and the old days in the USSR. Really quite brilliant. Of course, I would have loved being one of those in the know laughing from the sidelines, but you can't always be so lucky.

I never posted the pic we took mainly because I didn't know who the hell he was, and I suspected no one else would either. And I didn't find out that I'd been duped until this morning in my Yahoo Group from someone who'd run accross the page.

I promise you that I'll never fall for something like this again, unless of course it's someone really big like Christopher Reeves, Kurt Cobain or George Washington or somethin'. Now that'd be awesome!!

* * * * * *

Next contest, draw me being completely fooled posing with somebody obviously dead trying to promote my magnets. Whoever makes me look like the biggest tool gets to suck my big fat dick. Ready? Go!

Here, I'll get you started.

 

Read about the entire prank here at ImproveEverywhere.com
(I'm towards the bottom of the page.)

“Do you actually believe that Satan can be saved?”

Subject: Pray for Satan? Are you nuts?

Are you for real? Is this a joke? Do you actually believe that Satan can be saved? He is so unsavable..as much as Jesus cannot sin. He is the Father of Lies and the Great Deceiver..among many other characteristics too numerous to mention. I will pray for you, brother..or are you?

Sandra Almeida
sandy1996@earthlink.net


Yes, but isn't that why it's called "A miracle?" Look it up, Sandra. Even the impossible is possible through God. Luke 18:27
Or do you think your God is not powerful enough? Shame. I will pray for you.

Bob


“Father, right now I pray for "Bob"..take the veil from his eyes.”

You should read the Book of Revelations....Satan's destiny is already written..hell is not a place you want to spend eternity, young man.

Father, right now I pray for "Bob"..take the veil from his eyes. Open the eyes of his heart so he can see the truth...the REAL TRUTH. Give him a Damascus Road experience, if need be.In Jesus Name, Amen. Bob, Jesus died for you...even if you were the only person on earth, He would have died for you. When He was on the Cross, you were on His mind.

In His Grip,
Sandra Almeida
sandy1996@earthlink.net


Dear God, I pray for Sandra Almeida who does not understand the true girth of your power. Men like me and Sandra are easy for you to save, and I do not believe that it is any more difficult for you to save Satan just the same. I believe in your majesty and understand the limitlessness of your mercy. You forgave Jeffrey Dahmer, one of the evilest, homicidal cannibals ever to walk the earth, and I know you have the courage to forgive Satan as well. Please lift the blankets of doubt from Sandy's head. She does not understand who you really are and what pure grace really is. Show her that you truly are the ultimate purveyor of love unto ALL living beings. When He was on the Cross, even Satan was on His mind.
Total faith in You.
Bob

“I cannot help but wonder why so many atheists such as yourself spend their entire life trying to discredit someone whom they say they do not even believe.”

I cannot help but wonder why so many atheists such as yourself spend their entire life trying to discredit someone whom they say they do not even believe. If you do not believe in God or Jesus Christ, then why are you spending so much time and effort trying to mock Him? It seems to me that if you don't believe in something, then you basically just go on about your business focusing on the things in which you do believe.

Is Jesus a joke to you because he died on a cross? or is He a joke because He claimed to be the Son of God? I really don't see the humor in that. Many people have claimed to be God and/or Jesus...so why aren't you making fun of them? It's not very unsettling to me, though - what you do, that is... I know that Jesus Christ knew that you would be doing these things when he died on the cross - which ironically enough is exactly why he died - to save all sinners. Yes, Normal Bob Smith, yourself included. You are a sinner just like the rest of us. What you do isn't shocking to anyone. There is not much of a shock value in this generation - we've seen it all. It saddens me although I don't even know you, because I know that whether someone chooses to believe in God or not, he's real. One day you will admit to that too.

Cindy Minter
crminter427@yahoo.com


I found myself reading that first sentence of your email again and again and again. It is the sentence where you said you cannot help but wonder why so many atheists choose to discredit something we do not believe. I couldn't believe the statement was for real, as if I had misunderstood it or something, but as I read further I realized that it's just as you meant it.

Cindy, I am dying to satisfy that wonder. To be the one who clears the smoky air so that you can see the true colors of all which surrounds you, and one of the important purposes we humans have on our hands.

Did you know that children are being taught that the bible is true? Little kids email me thinking that one day long ago a man died on a cross to free planet earth of its sins for those who believe it to be true! There are little children in big buildings being told that there were never any dinosaurs, that they are a hoax manifested by scientists working for Satan, either that or the dinos lived along side human beings like Noah, Moses, Christ, etc. These children are being told that animals, under the power of God, have spoken words out loud, that life doesn't evolve, pride is a sin, and there aren't any answers to their questions so instead they must be satisfied with faith. These things that are the building blocks of ignorance are being preached to people all across America and around the world with the instructions not to question, with the threat of eternal suffering. Such horrible pictures to paint on something only strung together by hope.

Now you ask me why I try to discredit it? Well, wonder no more, Cindy Minter. I have your answer in hand, and it is blasphemy to the core! It is the same answer you would give for why we should discredit any untrue teaching. And if you are not discrediting teachings that you know to be false then it is you whom I wonder about.

Jesus is a joke to me because he was only a man and not a god. And instead of dying for the salvation of mankind he has died only so that we can sell fables as fact and guilt people out of their common sense. His death has been romanticized to such an extent that it's no longer a tribute, instead only an embarrassment.

So Cindy, as long as there are obvious untruths being taught as truth I will do my best to discredit them. And the mere fact that you are left to wonder why exposes the tremendous lack of thought you yourself have put into the matter at hand. You've no right to condemn anyone to your luminous skies of fear. All of your reasons are empty.

Balls in your mouth.
Bob


“you see it takes intellict to debate such a concept as Christianity.”

I'm so glad to receive a response from you. I have seemingly stirred something inside of you - which is good. You see, Bob, you seem to be overlooking the obvious. You plainly stated in your email, "... as long as there are obvious untruths being taught as truth I will do my best to discredit them." You do not even realize that you are not in fact an atheist. You are most certainly working for a "higher power" - his name is Satan.

You see, you are only choosing to try to discredit Jesus Christ. Santa Claus is just one of many fictional characters (tooth fairy, Easter bunny, etc.) that children are taught to believe until they are old enough to realize their parents were lying to them for years. I don't see any Buddha fridge magnets for sale on your website...or how about a Muhammad dressup doll? These "gods" aren't of any concern to Satan because they aren't real; therefore, they aren't of any concern to you.

One purpose for selling these items is to try to arouse anger among Christians. I know this because if anyone does a search on "Jesus", your website is the second one to appear on a list of millions. It does not appear on an "atheist" search, or even on a "halloween" search (at least not the first 10 pages). Your intentions aren't to promote your beliefs (if any) nor to promote the empty concept of atheism, but to promote blasphemy of Jesus Christ.

Most individuals seeking fulfillment in their life always turn to faith for answers. If someone wanted to find out more about Jesus online, they would type in "JESUS" and do a search. Coincidental that your site is second (on Google) among a list of 21 million? I think not.

The thing is, Bob, you are not trying to discredit Jesus, you have merely made a refrigerator magnet as a dress-up doll! Is that the best you've got?? You see it takes intellict to debate such a concept as Christianity. A dress-up doll...that's what you call discrediting Jesus Christ? Sounds to me like you may need to try a little harder. It's going to take more than that to change the minds of millions who believe. I understand you are targeting children. Children lack wisdom and are weak-minded and vulnerable. That's probably the level on which you belong, though, Bob.

Also, Bob, I haven't condemned you. You said yourself, "... if you are not discrediting teachings that you know to be false then it is you whom I wonder about." You are teaching young children that Jesus is joke; something to be dressed up and mocked. You need not wonder about me, Bob.

Cindy Minter
crminter427@yahoo.com


“Why do you only have a cartoon image of yourself on your website? You have no other contact information other than your web address. Are you ashamed of your site? Do you fear recognisance? You sound so bold and so proud while you're hiding behind your cartoon images.”

Hopefully you will be just as anxious to address this question as you were my previous... Why do you only have a cartoon image of yourself on your website? You have no other contact information other than your web address. Are you ashamed of your site? Do you fear recognisance? You sound so bold and so proud while you're hiding behind your cartoon images. So, this means you have no real place of business other than sitting in your home in front of your PC. Indeed, you're quite the success, Bob! I do not discredit your God-given artist talent; however, I am certain as to why we will never see your work in the Sunday comics or any other nationally published newspapers or magazines.

Cindy Minter
crminter427@yahoo.com


All right, intellectual debates are not my strong point. I am a cartoonist, so my discrediting of Jesus Christ is expressed through my drawings. That's how I operate. Sorry! And your suggestion that I "try harder" to debate the issue, well, I don't think that's necessary. My magnets say it all, and if people want to know more on the matter then there are plenty of other sites on the Internet for them to visit.

I am a private person, Cindy. I choose to hide behind my cartoon image because my beliefs aren't anyone else's business. I shouldn't have to defend everything all the time. I have the right to freedom of speech and that includes a noble silence. Sometimes there is more strength in being silent, don't you think? I do.

Your suggestion that I am working for Satan, well, I can assure you that is not the case. Not only do I believe strongly that he probably doesn't exist at all, but I also once used to worship him and I know the sound of Satan in my ear when I hear it. Those voices are long gone and the only voice I hear now is the one telling me that the voice is MY OWN and to keep discrediting Jesus via dress-up style magnet kits.

And as for getting piublished, I have been published! It's a paper with high distribution that a friend of mine publishes. He's printed hundreds of his papers and it might get picked up by a magazine he said.

Bob

“wut the fuck was going thru ur trifflin ass head to make a web site like that of jesus”

Subject: what da fuck

why would u make sum dumb ass shit like this??? wut the fuck was going thru ur trifflin ass head to make a web site like that of jesus

Jammie
babyblue582@hotmail.com


RE: "what da fuck" Need I go on?

That's a very good question, Jammie. The thing that was going through my "trifflin ass head" when I made that website was a feeling that the people who believed in God were wrong. In fact, it was a sure feeling that the stories of Jesus raising people from the dead, walking on top of the water, and being the Son of God were all tall tales, make-believe stories, enhancements/revisions to the life story of a man who was just a man. That's what. Then I started to weigh out reasons people believe it all to be true. It didn't take to long before I figured out that the reason for belief had nothing to do with proof, logic or science for that matter. That's why faith plays such an essential role in religion.

So I asked myself again: What are the reasons people believe? You know? Why even begin to believe it in the first place if there's no evidence backing any of it up? And I realized that most people start believing it simply because they've been taught it from the start, since they were children. Now, I don't know about you, but I was told stories as a child that still linger in the back of my head as truth! Like "Fish don't feel pain." That's a quote from my grandpa who's a fisherman. I always used to feel bad for the fish when I saw them being cleaned and gutted while they were still clearly alive, so he told me that fish don't feel pain. I swear I believed that for years, and it still raises the question up in my head every once in a while. And you want to know why? Because it was told to me by an adult when I was a kid. Imagine how something like that can stick with you if everyone around you is saying it, pastors, teachers, neighbors, relatives all telling you that Jesus is God, Noah saved all the animals and angels look over us while we sleep. That's how religions go - passed down through the generations, adult to child.

Now I know that many adults convert to Jesus as well, but those adults generally do it for a very similar reason. It's still an inability to parent ones self so the role is given to this imaginary parent named "God."

From all of this I concluded that people are willing to push all logic aside and believe the outrageous stories simply for that feeling of safety a God watching over them gives. This is what people do instead of accepting the obvious less safe alternative - God & Satan are made-up. And this is the precise reason I made what you've referred to as "sum dumb ass shit like this."

I hope that I've answered your questions and perhaps opened your eyes at least a little to why what you believe is a load of horse shit.

Bob

 

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