Hustlin' "No God" on the streets of NYC.

Their emails will be in blue while mine are in black and white.

With all the trouble I've been gettin' into on the Internet trying to dish out my flavor of atheism to the masses (lawyers tryin' to shut me down, trouble with spam (it hasn't been working for the last 4 days, so if you tried to email me I didn't get it), and the whole losin' my host fiasco, I've been forced to take my message to the streets!

Hustlin' ain't easy and there's a lot you gotta know if you're gonna try to become a real street hustler in NYC... especially if you're pushin' anti-God propaganda. Too many eyes... too many eyes.

There are 5 basic things you gotta know if you're gonna be a successful anti-God hustler on these streets.

#1 has to be: Somthin' to say.
If you ain't got nothin to say then you're shit-outta luck. One quote I've trademarked is: "One plus God equals one."
Said quickly and smoothly, this'll get strangers takin whatever it is you're givin' away. And this leads us to the next most important thing a hustler's gotta know...

#2. Sayin' as much information as quickly as you can and still be understood.
This takes a clever tongue that can keep a fast pace. That means sayin' it like it's one long-ass word:
"godisfake, godisfake, godisfake, checkit out, checkit out..." and so on.
A person will walk by you in just a matter of seconds, the object is to get those words inside their head within that tiny window of time. Practice sayin' it several times as quickly as you can and you'll be part way to bein' a workin' city street hustler!

#3. Pickin' a good street corner.
Look for crowds. Many times if you're not sure if a certain corner is gonna work, look around. If you see a whole lot of deadbeats beggin' for quarters, tryin to sell used magazines, handing out coupons and tourists, then that means it's a perfect corner to be hustlin'! This is gonna be where the out-of-towners and scumbags meet head on, and you wanna be right in the center of it all!

#4. Clog the sidewalk!

The more space you take up and the more you're able to interrupt the flow of walkway traffic the more people that'll be bunched up around you to hear & take your message! If you can get people to clench their fists over their ears in aggravation then you're doin' your job!

#5 Gettin' rid of the deadbeats!

Nothin' can be more irritating than having some nosey louse hangin' around wanting an explanation for what it is you're dealin'. A quick "Move along move along" should get these pests outta the scene. If that doesn't work then there's nothin' wrong with a gentle shove on the back of a shoulder along with "no loitering no loitering" to get even the most determined dirtbag outta your hair.

So there ya go. Learn those simple huslin' rules and you're on the fast track to hustlin' success! Okay, now move along move along... okay.. who's next who's next who's next?

“I suggest seeing "Passion of the Christ" it might give you an Idea about what Jesus did for you and every other person who ever lived.”

I just recently visited your website with the "dress up Jesus" magnet thing. seeing that really makes me sad. If you actually took time to get to know what he was about and what he did for you, I dont think you would even thing about putting that up there. You are showing a person being crucified, and you have nice little summer hats to put on, or a devil's suit. I suggest seeing "Passion of the Christ" it might give you an Idea about what Jesus did for you and every other person who ever lived.

Jason Engler
peace_not_war@hotmail.com


Jason Engler,
I saw The Passion of Christ, and quite honestly I didn't like it. Too violent. Jesus suffered way too much for my taste. They should have scaled back the violence, then it might not have left such a bad taste in my mouth.

You know, I would have liked very much to have seen what John Hughes or maybe Ron Howard would have done with it. And Tom Hanks would have been a great lead! Don't ya think?

Over all I get it two and a half stars.
Have you seen Van Helsing yet?!

Bob

“Tell me what you would tell him if he come to take you to your everlasting place now”

What does Jesus mean to U in your daily walk of life. Tell me what you would tell him if he come to take you to your everlasting place now, and where will that be? With him or without him.

emppray@telkomsa.net


Well, as for me and Jesus in my daily walk of life, He's the Guy putting a buck in my pocket! Without Jesus and the millions of people who believe that He was God my fridge magnet empire wouldn't be squat! I also wouldn't have the comic that I enjoy drawing so much! So I guess I'd have to thank Him for that too.

Oh! And my humongous hate mail section where kooky people who think dinosaurs were around during biblical times because they got no other explanation except that maybe they're a lie manifested by Satan. I love those letters! So I guess the more I think about it I have a lot to be thankful to Jesus for.

I suppose if I could tell Jesus one thing I'd tell Him thank you for everything He's done for me.

Oh! and then I'd ask Him why the hell He cares so much if we worship Him? So self-indulgent! I feel so modest next to Jesus! I suppose I'm just a better person than Jesus was.

Thanks for the email.
Bob

“you shouldnąt make fun of somebody's religion thats wrong!!!!!!!!!”

this is very disturbing its you shouldnąt make fun of somebody's religion thats wrong!!!!!!!!!

Allysa Moyer
angelface331@msn.com


Yeah, I know. why is that? To me it's no different than makin' fun of somebody's bad haircut. I mean, you can go get a bad haircut fixed, or sometimes it's just an awkward stage that someone will just grow out of.

We all go through those wacky phases in our lives (bad haircuts/silly beliefs) and there's absolutely nothing wrong with crackin' a little smile at one's self about such things. Hell, it's not like makin' fun of cripples or retarded people.

Or is it?

Oh god! I understand your point now! I'm such an asshole!!!
Sorry!
Bob

“It is very disrespectful to all Christians who worship Jesus as their Savior.”

Dear Bob Smith,

I think that this web page is done in poor taste. It is very disrespectful to all Christians who worship Jesus as their Savior. It makes fun of the pain and suffering of a human being.

Sharon Smith
ssmith@ikansas.com


Hello Sarah,
I would like you to consider for one minute that I really don't care what you think. This isn't because I'm a heartless bastard or because I don't love anyone or anything, it's just that all you are to me is worthless electronic text on an email document... nothing more. Your feelings don't effect me and if they did I'd have to say that there'd be far greater issues at hand.

I also ask that in the future, when you are affected so deeply by something that you research it a little deeper and don't simply just go off half cocked and tell a stranger all of your opinions and ideas. Most of the time strangers aren't going to care and it just makes you look like kook.

I hope that I've made some kind of impression on you with this email.
Just mind your business, that's all.

Bob

“I am an artist myself also but I would never do similiar projects like you!!!!!!!”

Subject: Your offensive "art"

Hello,
I am an artist myself also but I would never do similiar projects like you !!!!!!! That's not only offensive to use Jesus' holy person for your entertainment and make money on it because of curious, careless or griddy people.

It is plain stupid for an artist or anybody.
Do you really think , that what you do is " cool" ??????????
That's dissrespectful and tastless!

Marek Sobieraj
Bieda8@aol.com


Hello Merek!
Oh c'mon, we all know you'd do similar projects like me. I mean, you're an artist, correct? We all do it!

You'd better fess up. We all know you'd do it because you think it's cool.
Naughty boy.
Bob

 

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