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Staying entertained in a coffee shop as the cold weather moves in
is a challenge.
Junkies & bums on their way to Starbucks
One of
the problems in the Union Square/St. Marks area of Manhattan is
the great number of junkies and bums there.
In coffee
shops they tie up the bathroom, spit when they talk... and many
other annoying things that I can't think of at the moment.
So anyhow,
Skater Bob, Venessa and some other friends of mine have found some
entertainment in sticking these signs I designed on bathroom doors,
entrances and windows of the Starbucks we frequent.
It's
just funny to see the expressions on some people's faces when they
see 'em.
No, we're
not anti-Starbucks, in fact our stickers have gotten a warm reception
from the employees!
We've
also had great fun in betting on the bathroom line. You see, every
Starbucks bathroom in midtown has a line, and the bathroom doors
there are all set to automatically lock when they shut (to keep
the bums and junkies out) at which point you have to ask an employee
to buzz you in.
Nessa
The game
is simple: Try to pick the person in line who won't catch the door
in time when the person comes out. It's a blast! When the door slams
shut and the person who'd been waiting there for 20 minutes yanks
on the knob and it's locked, our whole table screams and hollers,
even cries in amusement. It's an incredible rush.
Alex & Bob
Then
that person has to leave the line and go to the counter and ask
to be buzzed in while the whole line waits even longer. And sometimes
they just cut ahead leaving the person who went to the counter having
to wait once again.
We've
seen people yank on that door, then upon hearing our wails of uncontrollable
celebration, run from the premises humiliated. And some people never
learn! we've seen people miss it twice, even three times! And if
you're lucky enough to have bet on these prime horses then your
Double Espresso Mocha Latte is paid for at the end of the day.
People
just need to realize that the bathroom line (especially in a coffee
house) is the most important line you may ever stand in. You have
to be alert, observant and ready to move quickly. You've got 24
people after you depending on your sharp wits and skills. Don't
let them down... because if you do we may just be there profiting
off of your broken dreams.
Skater Bob & Pops
Email
Skater Bob
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| “I
pictured him and his friends laughing as they dressed
Jesus on the cross...I felt a sad love for them...” |
I'm sure you have
heard this one before....but I just put it on an away message
of a young friend of mine who linked "Jesus dress up" on his
info....And as I pictured him and his friends laughing as
they dressed Jesus on the cross...I felt a sad love for them
and the words, "Father , forgive them, they know not what
they do" came to my mind. The words, as you know, spoken by
our Lord from the cross as the people made fun of Him then.....So..I
love you...and pray for you to "return to your first love"
(forget the religion crap - but remember the relationship)....
Hope you take this
as it was intended...with love (and I'm not being sarcastic)....
Chris Thompson
thompsonstone@earthlink.net
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|
Hi Chris
When I received
your email I pictured you living in a world of confusion and
denial, somehow convinced that there was a time when animals
talked, men lifted oceans up from the earth, and virgins got
impregnated by super-beings so as to eventually save mankind
from the sin-debt they've accumulated.
I felt a sad love
for you, like a "love" you'd feel for a relative standing
alone in a cornfield waiting to be beamed up into outer space
by aliens. "Love" like that you'd have for a close friend
who's scared to look in mirrors because he's afraid the reflection
will steal his soul and sell it half price in "Reflection
Land" to the soulless and backwards Reflection Land people.
I hope that soon
you see the wackiness of your behavior and stop teaching this
senselessness to children (and I'm not being sarcastic).
No relation to
you what so ever,
Bob
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| “Because
I have God's heart and He loves you through me....I can't
help it!” |
Hi Bob,
I gotta tell ya,
you made an overnight celebrity out of me by posting my letter.
As soon as the kids saw it, my IMs started popping up all
over my computer telling me I was famous. Aparently being
selected by you is quite an honor, in their eyes. And, I always
welcome the opportunity to put myself in an arena with someone
that wants to make me look like a delusional moron. So thanks.
I do think you
are clever....and I hate to admit it, but I chuckle at some
of your retorts to the mail. They are very funny, (and some
well deserved). But, I do feel a little sorry for the ones
who obviously are trying to show you love the best they can
,and you cut them down. Something or someone has hurt you
somewhere along the line to cause you to be so radically anti-Jesus.
But that is between you and Him. And you know what I love
you cause Jesus does. and you say say, "you can't love me
you don't even know me!" and I say to you, as I said to one
of my "kids" when they said that to me - "Because I have God's
heart and He loves you through me....I can't help it!"...and
I'll be praying for you along with my other "kids"
.....Loving you
anyway
"Ma"
Thompson
thompsonstone@earthlink.net
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“Just
a note to wish you a happy Thanksgiving.....
oh.....but who do you thank?” |
Subject: just saying
hi
Hi Bob,
Just a note to
wish you a happy Thanksgiving as it is now "upon us" as they
say. Do you celebrate with a big meal with your family? You
certainly have a lot to be thankful for you are so creative
and clever! And you are developing quite a following of young
people! And you are so free! Free to say and do whatever you
like!.....oh.....but who do you thank?....Oh well, enjoy your
turkey anyway!
Love ya! (and,
unfortunately I do)
"Ma" Thompson (motherthomp)
thompsonstone@earthlink.net
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|
Yes, I will be
spending Thanksgiving with family; my parents, brothers and
their families, and I will thank them because they matter
more than the guy you'll be thanking.
Don't think that
the sarcasm in your "Oh well, enjoy your turkey anyway!" went
unnoticed. It's heartless and almost inhumane to put such
little value on your fellow man. Personally I think my human
loved ones are worth it. They really do mean a lot to me and
I hold them very close to my heart. To think that an atheist
has no one to thank or praise or love is a destructive inconsiderate
stereotype.
In my opinion your
"thanks to God" is a misplacement of priorities. I understand
that you believe your family's unanimous appreciation to God
brings you together through Him, but to me it's a fog between
you and them. A mutual agreement that you love the invisible
man more than you love each other... and that's such a sad
thing. This misplacement of priorities clearly showed it's
ugly head in your flippant email to me assuming that without
God no one is worth thanking. Nothing could be further from
the truth.
My family loves
me "Ma" and their love is real. The kind that has been tweaked
over time and customized to the specific individual. They
know me and trust me and respect me. And when they use the
word "love" I know that it goes deeper than typing it out
in an email to a stranger as you do. The love you throw around
appears to be weightless and without accountability. And there's
nothing worse than abuse of the word "love".
... especially during the holidays!
I really can't
love you because I don't know you.
Bob
|
| “you
can't be angry at something that doesn't exist. ...so
why make fun of something that doesn't exist....in such
a obsessive way....” |
Well, Bob
Such a quick reply!
And you seem a bid annoyed with my "putting little value on
my fellow man" ah yes....as you do. Forgive me for being so
insensitive. Of course you will thank your "human loved ones"
and I'm sure that they have so much to be proud of in you,
especially if they have influenced you in your passion. If
I was your mom, I'm sure I would be tickled to have you for
a son.
Now I really do
care about you....so much so that, and you will get a chuckle
out of this, I have you on the prayer list at our local Christian
Radio station. I just feel it is more than not believing in
God. It seems like you have been hurt somewhere along the
line and you are upset with God for it. That's what I think
anyway. But who am I. (and I'm sure you will tell me) And
I know you will say you can't be angry at something that doesn't
exist. ...so why make fun of something that doesn't exist....in
such a obsessive way....
well , I won't
say "love" since that annoys you .....sincerely
- Ma Thompson
thompsonstone@earthlink.net
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|
Hello Ma,
You have to admit,
anybody would be annoyed by someone telling them what they
believe and it isn't true. Your constant insisting that I
believe in God and angry at Him bothers me not only because
it isn't true, but it also insults my intelligence. Belief
in God is just a little silly. Believing in God and spiting
Him is retarded.
There are several
reasons why I obsess over this thing that doesn't exist, and
I'd like you to please notice how none of them include an
anger directed at God.
#1 Reason: The
topic absolutely fascinates me. Demons, Gods, the meaning
of life, death and the mystery of what lay after. Can you
blame me for being obsessed?
#2 Reason: I think
it's oh so funny. For so long the subject was taboo. Mocking
it now, well, now it's the joke that never gets old!
#3 Reason: It was
almost 30 years of my life! If I'd been taught that Superman
was God and then came to my senses 3 decades later I'd be
obsessed with him now. You just don't forget all that stuff
happened and keep your mouth shut about it. I mean, why don't
you just keep your beliefs to yourself and let non Christians
be? Exactly.
#4 Reason: It's
a source of constant inspiration for me. Being an artist,
one of the most difficult challenges is staying inspired.
The combination of its endless hilarity, knowing I'm right,
the taboo, and people kind enough to get involved daily (like
you) keeps me inspired beyond my wildest dreams. It's a platform
for me to show off my talents. A true blessing.
#5 Reason: I make
a living off of it now. Yes, it's true! People contact me
because they enjoy my site and they hire me to work for them.
And my fridge
magnets are proving to be all the rage as well (having
just sold 2,000+ to Urban Outfitters). So if responding to
goofy complaint letters is all I need to do to keep the money
comin' in, then color me obsessed!
#6 Reason: Girls.
Girls like my site. Girls like my art. Girls relate to my
writings. And some girls think I'm sexy! Ma, nothing can top
the prospect of actually meeting someone with similar interests
and beliefs who I'm attracted to... and is somehow attracted
to me too! By the way, got any hook-ups?
These are the non-anger-towards-God
reasons why I'm obsessed with my site. Oh, and that reminds
me,
#8 Reason: I hope to conquer the world and fulfill the demands
of The Dark One.
Thank you for the
email.
Bob
P.S. That prayer
list I'm on at the Christian radio station, is my site getting
a free plug each time it's prayed for? Lemme know.
|
| “I
want to know the "draw" to atheisim. ” |
Hi Bob,
Thankyou for taking
the time to give me such a long explaination. And I thank
you for tempering the sarcasim a little.... I apologize to
you for being somewhat sarcastic myself. I understand how
you could get a kick out of responding to your "hate mail"....
some of them really screaming for it.
My daughter and
I were reading them the other day and we both winced at most
of the "christian" letters. But I sense a sincerity in many
of them and they were very well written.... made some good
points. But that is niether here nor there.
you may wonder
if I have a life , like why am I writing to you when obviously
we are at two ends of the totem pole (there I used a pagan
symbol - make you happy!) Just a joke...not getting sarcastic!......
and niether of us are going to "win over" the other.......
I do have a very busy life....and I should be getting supper
prepared right now....but I am still interested in why you
believe the way you do......Because, my daughter is going
out with a kid that seemsd to think like you.....I love the
kid and I think all his friends are great (same train of thought)....
(I know Christians parents are supposed to make sure their
kids are "equally yoked") But I really feel that they are
supposed to be together...... so of course I want to know
the "draw"to atheisim.
I was also thinking
something...... it is strange (I think) that you went from
a believer........ to a "raging" non believere in your thirtys
(I guess from your info)...... and I went from a "raging"
non believer to a believer in my 20s. Why do people travel
seperate paths I wonder.
I do appreciate
your wit and talent ...just wish you were on "our side"....we
can use a little more "wit" lol ......
Well on to fix
dinner... and by the way, I'm sorry no free radio advertising,
Just your name is announced.... so I guess you will only get
blessings. Again thanks for "being real" this time.
"Ma"
thompsonstone@earthlink.net
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|
No problem. It
got a little sarcastic there, but I'm happy we're able to
get back to being real. But to your question:
What's the draw
to atheism? What is the draw to atheism?!? The "draw" is it's
the fucking truth! It's not a freaking mad house of fairy
tales and magic! It's basing your life on proof and logic
and common sense for Christ's sake! It's the rejection of
primitive superstitions thought up by hairy, ghost-fearing
cavemen and the quest of using the brain in your head to figure
it out for yourself!
What's this world
coming to?!? You need something to "draw" you to what you
believe, like a bigger prize at the end, an all encompassing
love or a personalized guardian angel?!? There is no "draw"
to atheism! Atheism is the obvious answer with no "over the
rainbow" ending, no God that'll pick you up and carry you
when you're weak, no pre scripted life purpose for each individual
to seek out and fulfill! It's the flat out dismissal of the
ludicrous!
It's taking responsibility
for yourself, your own life, making it what you want it to
be and learning from the mistakes you make. There's no God
that lifts you up or devil that pulls you down. It's life
Ma, and the sooner a person figures that out the sooner that
person will stop waiting for someone to point the way and
actually make their own adult decisions for themselves! What
the fuck!??!
Oh! And thank you
too Ma.
Bob
PS. Tell the kid
your daughter's goin' out with "hi" for me.
|
Visit
“Ma” on her one
web page (updated daily). |
