The journey into the bottomless pit of hate mail continues.
As always, their emails will be in blue while mine are in black and white.

I would like to take this moment to clarify some things about the Jesus Dress Up refrigerator magnets.

First let me say that they're on the other side of the world being produced right now. I hate how far away I am from them and I'm as impatient as you (more so even). For everybody that purchased a copy I assure you that they will be arriving soon.

Second, they're going to be great! The place where they're being produced in Hong Kong (I apologize for mistakenly saying Japan earlier) does incredible work. I've seen samples of the toys they've produced for Disney and Pepsi, and that combined with the colorful artwork I've designed means it is definitely going to be a good looking, high quality product I assure you.

Please be patient. I guarantee that anybody who purchases a copy will receive it. I'm dealing with a very reputable company who does quality work, but I've been told 6 to 8 weeks production time, and I'll be seeing the prototype this month (February 2003).

I can already tell that I am going to sell out. Of course I would have loved to have gotten a larger printing done but presently I could not afford such a large investment. So buy your copy today because I will eliminate the store page when they are gone.

I will keep you all informed as to their progress on a regular basis.

Now let's move onto some veiwer mail... from somebody who refused to send a picture of herselves.

I was wondering, what do you believe in? Do you believe that when we die that we just get erased from existence? Do you believe we reincarnate? Do you believe we become ghosts?

Personally I believe in science energy can not be created or destroyed so I believe that we will just move into another form of energy our body decomposes and becomes part of the earth and all that is around us. Death for me is just a death of what we perceive life to be, and how we fit our egos into the picture. I just wanted to get your viewpoint on this, you seem to be an intelligent individual and I like to see how others view our existence.

Tori Ward

Dear Tori,

All logic, all sense and everything that has proved itself true to me in my life has convinced me that when people die it's over and done with.

I do not believe in reincarnation or ghosts. Many people grasp onto the catch phrase "energy cannot be destroyed" in hopes that this somehow means we do not truly die. A body dies. You didn't exist 100 years ago and you will not exist 100 years from now. Any energy that wasn't spent holding onto your last few breaths of life will be buried in the ground and eaten by worms.

My feeling is that if one of those worms finds a tasty energy-filled section of my body to feed off of that it's hardly another earthly existence beginning for me. It is our egos that can not fathom no longer existing and this is what makes it so goddamn true.

Thank you for your question.

“This website is messed up and your going to hell for it.”

Subject: WOW!!!!

omg you actually have the nerve to do somthing like this. This website is messed up and your going to hell for it. I'm not a very religous person i dont go to church but even i wouldnt do something as messed up as this

Charles Nessmith

Just out of curiosity, are you going to Hell for your self-proclaimed half-assed religious beliefs and churchlessness?

I'm always interested in the requirements people set for themselves to gain entry into Heaven.


“I have no idea why you e-mailed me but go to hell bastard of satan!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ”

here is an idea bob! fuck you! You self absorbed asshole! I have no idea why you e-mailed me but go to hell bastard of satan!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Charles Nessmith

Um, I emailed you because I was replying to the email you sent me. Duh.

I also emailed you in hopes of getting some sort of answer to my questions.

Listen, we both know I'm doomed to everlasting hell fire for the sins I've committed here on planet Earth, so let's move on. Do you actually see yourself destined for eternal paradise after this email you've just sent to me? It's a fascinating scenario; one where you can type out these electronic messages to a complete stranger then at some point in the future find yourself lounging infinitely in Heaven's bliss.

Is that your reality?

“If you're interested in learning more about Christainity, check it out, which an excellent online community for this sort of thing. Go ahead and introduce yourself, if you apologize, you'll be forgiven”

Look, I value a sense of humor as much as the next guy. But, as a Christain, I need to draw the line here. Insulting my religon may be amusing to you, but if you have any sense of consideration, you'll realize that many others will not find that funny. God forgave all of those who crucified him, and you'll be forgiven too if you accept Him. If you're interested in learning more about Christainity, check it out, which an excellent online community for this sort of thing. Go ahead and introduce yourself, if you apologize, you'll be forgiven.

We'd also appreciate you take your site down, but if you don't wish to do so, then atleast add a disclaimer before the viewer has the chance of viewing your site's content.

Or, perhaps, we'll see a =P


I went and visited that Live Journal message board you had suggested to me. In my opinion this is a collection of people who have heard nothing other than the Bible's teachings therefore have no new interesting ideas or useful exchanges occurring at all. Their ignorance shows itself in their praises to God for getting paid sick days and their fathers buying them ponies. I see confused kids trying to figure out how to feel God and make sense of the nonsense, and I reflect back upon the confusion I felt that eventually woke me up from the madness.

I would venture to guess that a majority of these people (who you want me to apologize to) fear walking alone in the city after dark, have never had any other options presented to them, laugh at unfunny parts in television shows, and think atheism means hating God.

Inviting me to come apologize to the group sounds enchanting but it also insults my intelligence a great deal. Do you think that I am ashamed of what I've made and am so spineless that I'd let a message board community dictate my art?

Perhaps, Paul, my site is more than just supposed to be funny? Maybe I posted on the Internet to express how strongly I feel about my atheist beliefs? Maybe I was raised a Christian, grew up and out of the fairy tales and realized the foolishness I was buying into, so now I'm attempting to show others that worshipping ANY human god (no matter how nice He was) is a foolish thing to do.

I am not sorry for my site and your beliefs are no more sane than those of Marshall Applewhite. I think that you're teaching people foolishness and I think that that's a bad thing to do.

Feel free to post this on your boards if you wish.

“If your goal was truely to show the world as it is to religous people, perhaps a short essay of explanation may be better at achieving your goal”

I see what you mean by the people in that community. I'm not nearly as devout as most of them, but I actually repect them for that. I was raised Catholic and put into Catholic school from six to eighth grade (I'm in 9th grade now) and I had a miserable time. None of my "friends" liked me (they were a bunch of fucking backstabbers, but enh), the teachers scared me with the prospect of me being sent to hell, and other fun things. I stopped believing in God for awhile, thinking it was all made up crap, until I realized that Catholics aren't like all Christains, and that it's possible to live a Christain life without fearing hellfire 24/7. I remember telling my family before that I didn't believe in God anymore. Recently, I told my Mom that I didn't approve of the Catholic Church anymore. Both times I was laughed at. I don't care.

I don't want to turn this into a conversation about me, but what I'm saying is that I also grew up Christain, and I didn't like it. I saw plenty of "Christains" at Catholic school that were everything but, unless a teacher, priest, or nun were watching (then they were "such wonderful young men and women!"). There are plenty of Christains who are totally undeservingof the title. Maybe I don't deserve to call myself a Christain. I do know, however, that many of the people on that community are some of the most deserving of being called Christain. So what if they're niave (sp?)? God said that the only way to enter the kingdom of heaven if you are like a child. Sometimes I'm tempted to laugh at their silliness, but I see that if I'm ever going to become a true Christain, I'll have to accept everyone. And it's hard.

Which is why I'd expect some repect from you for me and my beliefs. I appreicate the civil nature of your response, and the fact that you even responded. If you value your website as art, that's fine. Just please, add a disclaimer on a splash screen, or even on top of the page. Most athiests I know online and in real life (and I know a good deal) are very moralistic people, and would atleast respect others by doing so.

Do you truely find comfort in upsetting others? Do you think your opening their eyes, and showing them the way our world really is? Do you think you're teaching them a lesson for their own good? Really, both of your websites are presented in a very immature fashion, and I don't think you'll do much more besides entertain the non-Christains and offend the believers. If your goal was truely to show the world as it is to religous people, perhaps a short essay of explanation may be better at achieving your goal.

Always good to talk to someone. <*/RANT>

Fact of the matter is, I do not respect your beliefs. I feel that a belief in almighty super beings, miracle-working spawns of God and the countless D&D adventures in the Bible are all complete and utter nonsense. I think that believing it makes you an extremely gullible person and I do not respect people who I see as being so catastrophically gullible.

The reason that I say and do all of this is because I think you are very very wrong and that I am obviously right. It's really just that simple. I do not say it to hurt you and others. I say it because I can't believe how blind you're being, how little you've really thought it through and also because I think it's a bad thing to believe nonsense.

Adding a disclaimer splash screen sounds like an apology to me. I am not at all apologetic for my beliefs or to people who are upset by them. I have written many essays on my beliefs, most of which are in response to people who've written me about how much they hate me and my site. Holding you in my arms and coddling you does nothing to make you think... in fact, that is exactly how you've found yourself in the "Catastrophically Gullible" category that you (and others like you) fall into. If this upsets you and others then that means you might actually think a little. I believe that if any Catholic or Christian person actually sits down and really thinks about what it is that they're being asked to believe... well, then that's a good thing.

Expect nothing but blunt, honest answers to your questions, and if you don't want answers don't ask me questions.

The Upsetter

“...DUMB ASS?”


Dan Crusan

I'm the wrong guy to ask. I'm quite biased.

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