Wonderful female fans...

and some guy.

In the following correspondences with Lori, an incident of my childhood is referred to. When I was approximately 12 to 14 years old my mother found a series of drawings that I had done of naked girls. My mother threw them in the garbage and made it clear to me that she didn't want me drawing naked girls.

My mother and father have both supported me in my art. They put me through art school, but admit now that they just don't "get" a lot of the subject matter that I choose. I write this because it wouldn't be fair for me to give an impression that my parents discourage my art.

Yeah, hey, love your site. Rock on. I printed out a picture of your Jesus Dress Up, with Jesus in a little "Devil" outfit. Yes, I handed to a very big christian who happens to be quite a little arrogant man. He proceeded to stomp it to the ground, and walk off heaving.
It made my day. From the looks of everyone laughing, I say it made theirs also.

Your fan,
Hannah


Hey.. Your site is definitely my favorite... I'm always entertained with your humor (and artwork). A friend of mine told me about your 'jesus dress up' page, I was very intrigued because that's definitely my type of humor. I have such a fun time reading the hate mail.. I don't understand why people like that would worry so much about a website.. if they really care, they should just move on in their bible studies and forget about people that they would consider to be 'sinful'. I have a delicious hatred for people that engulf themselves in things that upset them.

It makes no sense.. if you hate or are disgusted with something, why send emails and worry yourself about it? Although, it is very amusing to read the emails.. much of their time could've been saved by not letting things get to them. Although they are just standing up for what they believe in, they have to realize that it's only a website. I think people take life far too seriously, and I admire those who aren't afraid to have a good time and joke around about it. I'm all about having fun, and not worrying about what people think about something I like. But summing it all up.. You seem like such an interesting person.. I wish I knew you:o)

Carlie


Congrats on the kick ass web site. Personally I find the hate-mail to be the most hilarious part of your page.

I also was once a Christian, so I get a kick out of seeing the mentality of the group that I was once a part of. I attend a Catholic school at the moment and as often as I can I try to incorporate Jesus into everything I do. If I don't know an answer on a test, the answer is Jesus. If I cannot think of an idea for my next social project, the answer is Jesus. Just this year I wrote a retro style sitcom for a dramatic script in my communications class. I thought it was alright. If you would like to take a look at it let me know. Its called "That's My Jesus". It has all of those gimmicks like the catch phrases that were so common on those stupid shows, like that one with Urkel. The only difference is that it takes place in heaven and it has a bunch of biblical characters in it.

The mocking of Christ is an incredibly underrated activity. I feel that if people could poke fun at everything that they or anyone else find sacred, the world would be a much nicer place. Keep up the good work man. One day when you are snickering before "god" it will all be worth it, I guarantee it. Write me back if you have the time :)

Later Man, Aaron


Dear Bob,
I love you. I know you hear this all the time and are probably sick of it, nevertheless, it's true. While dress up jesus is amusing and all, I think your true talent lies in movie reviews. I couldn't even begin to produce a whole list of movies for you to review. Every movie would be great once you got done critiquing it. I did recently see The Replacements with Keanu Reeves and it was an extra big helping of shit. Perhaps you could start there. I also have included several links for yummy stuff.

Enjoy!
Valerie

Hi! I just wanted to drop you a quick line and tell you that I enjoyed meeting you and puttting a face to the "evil" Bob who is out there trying to torture all those innocent Christians by making them think for themselves. I hope I didn't manipulate your time too much, or interfere with your coffee time. I'm not really sure what opinions of mine you would want about your site, so if you ask, I'll be more than happy to answer, but off the top of my head I'm not sure what you're looking for from me.

But I do enjoy your site, and I will even more so now that I can kind of match the person to the pages. When I have time I want to look over your art again and see what it says to me now, just to see if my perspective has changed since seeing you face to face. My only regret.... we'll never know what the cleavage was worth to you. *SIGH*

Thank you Lori. It was great to meet you as well. I really did have a pleasant time with you. I hope that your time in Chicago was good.

Bob

I had a wonderful weekend in Chicago, and my roommate still can't believe I met you but I think she's getting used to the idea that you're a real person. *laughing* You have interesting timing.... I'm looking at your art pages right now.
Oh really?! And what are you thinking about the art (and me) now?

Ugh, it's hard to do this in email... but.... Your art is good, really good. I always thought that, and I envy your talent. The story that you told me about your mother throwing away your art stuns me when I look at the things you have created, and I wish that she would have acknowledged your talent before she condemned your subject matter. I'm almost offended on your behalf that she didn't recognize your talent (but since you're getting acknowledgement from all the ladies now, I can't feel too sorry for you *grin*) I'm also amazed that you stuck with it and glad for you that you did, because I can see the suffering and pain you were going through, and I think it would have been much much worse for you if you had no outlet at all.

Your pencil drawings are still my favorites because they are incredibly personal and show what you were trying to work through at the time, but they are "young" and as you move along through life, your art does mature with you, and becomes less self-conscious. It's interesting to see how you went from one medium to the other and to see how your techniques changed along with your self perceptions. I wondered why you made the style progressions, and I'm guessing you're mostly self-taught (certainly self-motivated) because you were getting little support at home, so it makes more sense to me now that you would make conscious decisions to try your hand at something new.

This is definately all uneducated opinion, based on my perceptions of you (like we talked about) but I think your recent work isn't nearly as personal, and you've learned to seperate yourself from it somewhat. I can't say that for certain because I'm only seeing things you've done for or about other people. It's wonderful stuff, but it doesn't invoke the responses that your earlier work does because it isn't as personally motivated. Although I do alot of work on the computer (mainly because my drawing skills are substandard, to say the least) I really do prefer drawings done on paper because it has a more intimate connection to the person. But that's just me, and I think the reason I do prefer your pencil drawings is because I can see your hand in it. If you still are doing pencil or ink drawings, I would be interested to see them because it's hard to compare the different mediums to each other.

And as for you, I think you're a good man, so if you're not too busy, I'd like to start stalking you as soon as possible. You're in the phone book, right?

Lori

Damn I'm a self centered prick. I love this letter AND I look forward to your random stalkings.

Hello Bob,

Self-centered? Not at all. Prick? That's a "no" too. Actually I wondered if you would think I was talking out of my ass and analyzing you too much, but since you enjoy it, I think I'll be a natural for this stalking gig. Yippee!


You know, I was just thinking....

I really wonder what's going on in your head over there. I'm just kind of curious if you're just tolerating and/or humoring me, and since I told you my impressions of you, I think it's only fair for you to share your impressions. I'll let you humor me on this one.... see how giving I am?!?

Oh, and by the way, I just finished reading your new hate mail pages.... I was crying with laughter at the Tyler files, your response about the 'good/bad times that you have to look out for" was too funny. Then the grumpy jesus drawing reminded me of the time I made a Moses costume for my brother for Halloween and he had too many gin and tonics at the bar and passed out on the front lawn and we discovered the next morning he had broken his commandments... ahhhh...... memories ! But thanks to you, now everyone thinks I'm insane because I'm in the computer lab all the damn time cracking up at the screen. Can I send my therapy bills to you?

Lori, I have no problem with this assignment. I have to admit that upon meeting you I was happy to see that you are much prettier in person than the original photos I'd seen on your site. The newer photos that you recently sent me are much better pictures of you. I also really liked talking to you. I prefer that so much over emails (hence my short replies).

You reminded me a little bit of my cousin Marty (who is a wonderful person). The similarities are hard to pinpoint but I'm going to try. You both have a very independent mood about you working in conjunction with a sharp sense of humor that I bet has caught more than a few Indiana guys off guard.

There was also a realization that if you were to move to Chicago that'd I 'd enjoy having coffee with you. Now I do have to base this all on the fact that I enjoyed sitting with you while you showered me with compliments. But we talked about several other things as well and I was genuinely entertained.

I've been trying to map out a way in my head to properly post your emails in the next Fan Mail page that I do. I want to show you, and our meeting properly because I think that it is an interesting item to say the least.

Is that enough? Hey, how's the stalking of me going?

Bob

Greetings Bob,

I think I need a break from my stalking duties, but I'm really writing to pick your brain for a minute.... no one here really has an answer or even gets WHY I would ask these questions, but I think maybe you will, being the all knowing Bob. Perhaps if you can't answer this, you can forward these on to god, seeing as how you have a direct link to him on your site.

Have you ever wondered if you're only allowed to be so happy for so long before it's necessary for something to come along and kick you in the shins and remind you that life isn't about being happy, you have to be made to suffer (usually when you're at your happiest) and if you refuse to play along, well then the fall will be that much worse? Is there some rule that NO ONE can ever tell you that they love you without some sort of expectation or apology attached to it? And the one that I really hate... do you believe in fate? That's there's one person out there for you, just waiting to be found, and if you pass them up, well then you're settling for less? Who made this shit up, I mean that one really irritates me, I might as well believe in fairy godmothers and a prince on a white horse, but I digress.

I know you've talked about people abusing the word "love" and I agree with you completely. I wonder sometimes if many people truly know what it means, much less how to live up to it. My father, of course, with his advice, told me to go to church and let god handle it. My friends, meaning well, tell me I'm just going through another one of my "phases" and I'll get over it. I dunno, maybe I'm just being morbid and cranky, and sorry about the vent, but there it is.

Lori

Holy Christ Lori! This is definitely a subject that I am not experienced in. All of my romantic relationships have ended. My eyes are bigger than my capabilities, and my heartless Vulcan logic does not mince well with an eternal love outlook. Not only that, but my opinion changes depending on whatever my current status might be at any given moment.

So here's how I am at present. I am single and in love with nobody. My mood is slightly down due to what looks to be a long Winter of cheesy star tributes for those who were obliterated in the terrorist attacks. And more importantly, my little world needs some change but I'm not sure what that change should be (I think that I need to be doing more art). So with all of this in mind, here is my opinion.

There is no such thing as fate. For fate to exist there'd have to be things in life that are predetermined. This would take all of the purpose and fun out of it. There is not somebody out there for everyone. That is a line cooked up to be served with pity. There are many people who settle for less. Some are able to find happiness there, most are not. I think that a lot of people don't even know what it is that makes them happy. Finally, happiness always ends (especially in Indiana). But then again it always returns. It just seems like predetermination when in fact there are only 2 options.

This is all my opinion. If you want the truth I suggest you emailing God directly. He knows everything.

Bob

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