Real life fan mail and the
pictures that they've included of themselves!
Bob, I recently came across your website & just had to
write to tell you how much I enjoy it. I am always excited
when I find a worthwhile site such as yours, while surfing
the net. Not only do I really like your style of artwork,
but it's your honesty that is most admirable. I especially
love the "Jesus Dress up".
like that really takes balls, and it's obvious (by reading
your hate mail) that you take alot of flack for it. I
also do some playing with Jesus myself on my website (which
I too get much flack for). Although it's a different kind
of site (hee hee). Is there any chance you'd be able to
do a custom dress up for me? I'd love to have something
like that on my site. Please let me know if something
like that is possible sweetie. I promise I'll make it
worth your while (wink wink). Hope to hear from you soon
& keep up the good work.
of love from your new fan, AnastasiA
Attached is a picture of me. Hope you like it. Creepy
jesusdressup.com is a fuckin riot. its amazing how pissed
off people can get over a internet
site ya know? and the funny part is how almost all of
the hate mail (at least that youve put up on the site)
ends up giving the same message.... "your going to die
burn in hell your an ass ect." Dont you just enjoy christian
think its absolutly great what your doing, with the whole
god ate my balls section. i mean seirously...people believing
there is an invisible man in the sky... why not fairies
or zombies. and will there be free will in heaven? its
like a trick question...either way it ends up falsifying
(is that a word?) the entire idea (if you have free will
you can sin, and its a sinless enviornment, if you dont,
it wouldnt be heaven, because heaven paradise, and without
free will you cant really have paradise). just a thought.
sorry this was so unorganized and the likes. keep up the
good work w/ jesusdressup.com, and good luck with your
i frequent your site very, well, frequently. after a long day
of classes i like to unwind by making jesus wear a mr.
peanut outfit. somehow, life seems a bit more bearable because
of the funny pictures by the green haired boy.
yah, attatched is a pic of me. behind me you can sort of see,
under the tacky picture of elvis, a holographic depiction of
"the last supper."
Bob, Bob, I have been a fan for quite some time now. This is
my favorite web site. Well, actually it's a toss up between
you and lesbian porn. . . . That didn't sound right.
have been dying to write to you, but the toughest decision I
have to make is which picture to send. I'm the one in the skunk
suit (polecat), don't know if Doc (the other gentleman in the
photo) shares my views or not, so this letter only applies to
First of all, I love the hate mail and your thought provoking
retorts. It never ceases to amaze me how angry some people get
when you simply disagree with their views. I am also of the
opinion that the ones who strike out most vehemently in any
argument are the ones on the shakiest ground. I consider myself
a devout agnostic, and have had numerous discussions with believers
(including my girlfriend), these people are friends, neighbors,
and family members so I have to be gentler and more diplomatic
than you are with the angry hordes. Perhaps that is why I enjoy
reading your witty jabs at the flimsy wall they have built around
themselves. I'm jealous!
I truly wish I could say to them is how silly it all seems.
I asked my girlfriend (twice) if God was an egomaniac, that
the creator of the universe required me to bow down and acknowledge
his greatness or be condemned (sounds like Ming the Merciless).
Her answer was "yes" (both times). During a conversation with
my neighbor, I said to believe in God I might as well believe
in ghosts and UFO's. Her response was a wide eyed "How can you
not!". At every turn I am forced to bite my tongue and let it
go. They seem so willing to discuss the topic as if they were
open minded individuals, but in truth being a believer requires
one to close the mind and accept everything at faith value.
And as I do not wish to knock the crutch out from under them,
I must go to NormalBobSmith.com and laugh my ass off at their
silly arguments to convert you and watch you pummel them with
sarcasm, wit, and logic. I have pondered at length at what drives
people to religion, so here is my two cents:
beings are knowledge seekers. We wish to understand everything.
When we come to a point where something is beyond us, we find
this unacceptable. Sometimes it is so intolerable that we invent
an answer. Ancient peoples believed the sun and moon were gods
riding through the sky. Floods were sent by wrathful gods to
punish the wicked. And that thing in the sky that looks amazingly
like a hubcap must be a superior race of beings from a distant
galaxy trying to study us.
point is, all religions today are based on ancient texts that
were written by a science and technology deprived society. Try
writing that book today and it would be laughed at as bad fiction.
There are a great many things we still don't know, but I'm just
not willing to stamp "Hand of God" on everything I don't understand,
just to put my mind at ease.
other quick note; Why does the God that loves you for who you
are want you to change?
Remember WWJD We Want Jack Daniels!
number one fan (without breasts),
Christ, it's me again. Okay, maybe that was a little tasteless.
Anyway, all through this, I keep coming back to your site to
check for new stuff...because, as you said, there's a difference
between respecting what has happened and beating yourself down,
day after day, by constantly watching the news and shuffling
through letters from horrified fellow teenagers, as I've been
doing on my
one said being patriotic meant being depressed, dammit. Donate
some blood, money, or time instead of writing hatemail, people.
You're proving how shallow you really are. Although they are
so very amusing to read, so maybe I should take back that previous
comment. Yeah, donate blood and keep writing hatemail, that's
really the best possible outcome.
Gawd Bless America!
in your mail,
include a picture, and if it's interesting enough, I'll post
Over The Edge!
picture is of my own selection.
your Dressup Jesus thing is fucking funny as hell.
I surfed through the rest of your site as well. I
am not a christian by any means. I think the bible
was a bunch of nice stories and jesus was a man who
once actually lived. I can go far beyond that though.
that I did find interesting was that you dont believe
in god because you dislike christianity or the christian
god or whatever.
FYI, there are
about 1432514361376153765472363457335436 other religions
that believe in a "god" or supreme being... saying that
there is no divine presence is just being an irrational
dick. Ever hear of karma? I agree christianity is a crock
of shit meant to sedate the masses... but that doesnt mean
I dont believe that there is a god...or energy of some sort.
The budhist faith believes in energy...ok so are you just
bashing catholicism or what?
Im sorry if I
have found that if there is something that I dislike (Dirty Pop,
Obstructed Urinary Canal Disorder, God) I make myself believe that
it doesn't exist. Most of my deep rooted, heartfelt beliefs are
based on this form of "ignoring".
a path of ignorance as I do is a noticeably directionless way of
life, but it keeps my mind free of thoughts that could distract
someone who might repeatedly think things out. I suppose that this
is why much of what I say is so irrational huh?
of course I've heard of karma. It's the leading form of justice
for the ignorant! It's the reason why everyone always gets what
they deserve all the time... like in the movies! But oddly I don't
believe in any forms of energy, so I'm going to pretend like I didn't
hear you say that. See how it works?
06 Sep 2001
your drift in a new fanmail letter. Sorry I sent you
my art on paper and I didn't know you don't care about
what other people do. I didn't realize you were so
hardcore about originality, as much as to not want
to look at what other people do. I think it's cool
to see what you can do, and I also like to see what
other artists do because I enjoy it. And yes, sometimes
influenced by it. It actually drives me to come up
with something better. Unfortunately, I sent you pictures
that were already on my hardrive that were probably
not too original.
of life drawing out there. I will not be petty and say I
don't appreciate what you can do. But what I sent does not
define my abilities. The stuff you've posted up from your
portfolio is the same as what I scribble on notepaper at
work. It's not good to fall into the trap of being so arrogant
to think you are more original than the next person. I just
do what I want to do, and I find trying really hard to be
less mainstream than everyone else is still trying to be
like somebody else. I'm open to trying everything, and it's
hard to find out what everything is if you're not willing
to listen and learn from what others have done. I guess
like how you've learned stuff from your brothers and applied
it to your own work.
Well, if you
find out what's more original than working on a Mac in Illustrator
and Photoshop, let me know. I've already seen dead animal
carcass works pinned to a wall and placticised cadaver sculptures,
so I'm really interested in seeing what Bob Smith has up
his sleeve. Don't worry,I won't bother you by sending more
of my stuff, but you could've let me known instead of making
me feel like an ass.
24 Sep 2001
'bout we don't discuss art?
recent trajedies, I was compelled to write, even if
you don't want to hear from me. I really think people
need to wise up now (as they should have a long time
ago). I don't think all the religionatics realize
how they aren't so different from the jackasses that
feel they have to blow up people to prove a point.
Most don't have guns or the will to kill, but the
brainwashing is the same. It's two seperate, closed
and ignorant societies. It's dangerous to be so dedicated
to religion, and this is what happens when people
don't think for themselves. Hitler all over again.
A scary thought
is that there's christians out there saying "go over there
and kill them all". Yet these nutcases have done what they
feel they need to in the name of god. It is so obviously
wrong, however, maybe some people will realize that religious
brainwashing made it come about. And cause they're assholes.
I think it's an even greater trajedy if nobody looks inside
themselves and realizes how shit like this happens. This
is a struggle of one religious group thinking that the other
is so horrible they have to die. Americans have killed for
their causes and the middle east has killed for theirs.
The recent attack
is so devastating it has affected everyone the world over,
like a knife in the back. And how no responsibility by anyone
was taken, no one to fight, no point made other than what
is assumed. It makes me sick. No one understands it, but
no one wants to. These people cannot be bought. There are
people out there that could turn those responsible in, knowing
that there's a 5 million price tag on Bin Laden's head.
It's pure blind faith in their god that keeps them going.
That same blind faith that so many write to you about, trying
to convince you how necessary it is. Christians try to perpetuate
this blind faith, yet it is the same faith that caused so
many deaths. Notjust 2 weeks ago, but over years and years.
Yet during these past weeks constant coverage, you hear
the President telling everyone to pray and look to god.
How about, if no one believed in god this would never happen.
I guess it wouldn't be very politically correct. The very
things that are caused by worship are the things that cause
people to worship more. And for this reason, on top of the
senseless deaths, the prospect of war and the economic devastation
of it all, I am very sad. It think it's good news that people
have come together, but it's temporary at best.
Stuck in a Country with 2 Fighter Jets and 5 Guns
glad you're back. I tried several times to respond to your email
but each time I realized that you were right.
26 Sep 2001
It's great to see you're a man and can admit it. Unfortunately,
it usually takes a man a month to do so. I thought
you'd be pissed off and that I was some crazy, stalking
type girl that was on the verge of obsession. That's
why I thought you didn't respond. I figured the only
reason you had your site was to un-convert christians,
and that maybe you had more fun breaking apart their
belief system rather than conversing with those that
have something relevant to say. But I didn't really
believe that myself, so I thought I'd try another
letter. It's nice that you remember me, you must get
lots of emails.
There was something
that I was going to write to you before, however, it would
have been more demeaning in the context at the time (but
I'm in a more revelation mood right now). What I'd like
to tell you has to do with being born again. I have a theory
on being a born again human. The thought didn't occur to
me until I stumbled upon your site. Not often does someone
grow up being told to believe in all that god crap, and
actually breaks away. It takes a strong person, so I respect
you for that. But there are repercussions to looking at
the world in a different way. I can only speak for myself,
but I think it affects the way I see everything. As I've
said before, I never believed in anything. Then, when I
was about 17, I decided to believe in myself. Now, at 23,
I realize I'm a bitter bitch close to loneliness and intolerant
to what most everyone thinks because I know they're stupid
and wrong. And you, being relatively new to a life without
a "higher power", how do you feel about everyone else? You
are bombarded with all this idiotic redereck, and it must
fuel your fire and convince you more of your beliefs. But
now what? If ignorance is bliss, what is intelligence? I'm
asking for your help in a response. Have you realized any
bitterness and anger accossiated with the burden of being
realistic? Maybe your way of dealing with it is dress-up
jesus. The sarcasm and tongue in cheekiness is great. I'm
the same way. It has defined my personality. But I'm not
As far as intolerance
goes, the reason I was a little pissed when I read that
you don't like to look at other peoples' art was because
I've tried very hard to be openminded. I realise that with
the chip on my shoulder, it's very easy to snap at people
and be a horrible person. I also realised that since most
people are religious, I thought most of what people say
and do is redundant. But that's not realistic either. What
I'm getting at is that maybe you feel the same way, maybe
you're blinded by anger and bitterness at the whole "being
duped by the god thing" for a long time (what a waste of
time and mindfucking). And also the anger of all these innoccent
kids being hearded into the mindslaughterchurch to be spit
out at the end either idiotic or angry and confused. I'm
reading between the lines here, obviously. And also projecting
my own twisted feelings. But I don't think I'm far off.
What I'm hoping to find out from you: if religion is the
pseudo-deepness that people require to feel fulfilled, what
is there for people like us? All my hedonistic pastimes
don't seem to be doing it anymore.
is hard in Canada, when you have to pay 45%+ in income tax
if you make over $70 000 (approx. $40 000 Am.). Can you
imagine paying $20 000 in tax if you made $40 000 a year?
It's hard to strive for that unattainable goal, when it's
easier to make less money yet bring home the same money.
And here's the kicker: 15% tax on all purchases. I found
out about the World Trade Center when I was listening to
Howard Stern that morning. It felt so personal, because
so many Canadians feel like Americans that haven't moved
there yet. I sent some money to the fund H.S. is raising
because I didn't know what else to do. There were people
from here calling random phone #'s in N.Y. just to tell
them they care. It was kind of endearing. I have a friend
in New Jersey and at this point, I'm thinking of moving
in because apparently, my country is proud of being a stepping
stone for terrorists. Refugee with no job skills or money?
You're in! There's a Canadian working 2 jobs to support
you right now! Do you want free braces to build your self
esteem? Food and clothes for your 8 children? There's a
Canadian that didn't have children because they have to
support yours! Don't speak English? That's fine, half of
the street signs aren't in English anyways...how about Chinese
or French? Multiculturism My Ass, by Sara. Thoughts on a
tolerant society. What are yours?
Angry Sara (I
hope you've come to expect nothing less than a rant by now)
have been asked many many times about why I'm so angry and
why do I hate. If I were feeling those things I would admit
it. I don't care what people think, I'd say it.
I don't see myself as angry or with hate. I love my parents
(who are still Christians) and I like to see them often. I
have no problem with hearing my mother or others talk about
their beliefs in God. I'm interested in what she thinks and
I like to talk to people about it. I'm a pretty content guy.
I guess if I had my choice right now I'd be going to bed with
some gorgeous girl and I'd be richer... but I don't feel any
bitterness towards Christians or the folks who attack me.
fun for me. It really is. I LOVE going across the street every
day or so to the coffee shop and writing to these strangers
who tell me to stop what I'm doing. I sit there and write
peacefully, I people-watch, sometimes run into friends, even
meet a girl or two here and there. It's a pretty enjoyable
luxury that I appreciate every day. When I'm through, I walk
across the street to my apartment looking over the city and
I type it all out on my computer and send them off. I eagerly
anticipate the responses and all of the comedy it generates.
am probably a bit more jaded than most. I don't let ANY of
the letters get to me. The people don't know me. All they
know is a character they've painted in their heads of who
they think I am. I'm totally free of them.
I enjoy doing this all a bit too much and I probably don't
have the social life I should be having. But I don't know,
I've left it open for me to stop when ever I want to. I don't
owe anybody anything so if I don't feel like working on it
can be an asshole on the Internet sometimes. I have a hard
time caring for someone just through emails. If something
gets "heavy" in an email correspondence I may just drop contact.
It's better off. I really have to meet someone face to face
for me to really start caring.
have to say that I was bitter at first when I had no outlet.
When I felt it was all wasted time and I was lost with the
loss of my belief. But now I've found a fun project that entertains
me (and hopefully others) and I get to talk about myself endlessly.
It's a very selfish hobby... but not an angry one.
are a gorgeous girl and I wish you were nearby so that I could
meet you. Maybe have coffee.
I clicked the
US flag on hatemail
42 and found a kind of 10 Commandments for your
flag. What is the difference between "Patriot" and "Christian"?
You seem to have
realised the folly of Christianity, may I suggest you apply
the same thought process to your flag (A piece of cloth
and no more) and all the related dogma. Your conclusions
would be received with interest.
difference is that America exists, God does not.
Thank you for taking
the time to reply. I remembered a picture this time, entitled
"Peter becomes a Special People". I
am the Peter on Hatemail 42 part 2.
exists, God does not? A big difference, perhaps. A
meaningful difference, I think not.
implies that blind faith and worship are OK so long
as the object of veneration physically exists, I do
not want to believe that this is your intention.
of "America" (Or any nation) is as fictitious as God.
(Perhaps that should be "ideal" not "idea"?)
I wasn't asking about America, I was asking about
the flag fetish and the instructions for reverence.
faith that I have in America is not blind. America is a country
that is flawed in many ways but despite the horrific events that
took place earlier this month, I still feel safer here than I would
anywhere else under similar circumstances.
have always professed my appreciation for the freedom I am allowed
here and the accumulation of diversity that that freedom promotes.
The flag fetish that you think I have is simply my way of saying
"thank you" to the ground that I walk on every day.
don't yet worship the American flag, but if you slapped the pattern
on a pair of thigh high boots and the right pair of legs there's
no telling what I'd consider.
the qualification for the Special Peoples Club is not to disagree
with me. It's a willingness to profess your ignorance in a variety
of subjects relating to your basic belief system. So please expand
on your thoughts and I'll see if you qualify.
Over my many
years on this planet there has been little I have believed
in. Many friends have tried to persuade me to the christian
religion, I keep telling them its bullshit but they dont
believe me. So now I just send them your site and tehy dont
talk to me anymore!!! Thanks so much for getting rid of
them. Also, I was contesting the thought of you being the
epitome of what I would like to be, but there was much question.
After reading the "fanmail issue 14"
faith that I have in America is not blind. America is a
country that is flawed in many ways but despite the horrific
events that took place earlier this month, I still feel
safer here than I would anywhere else under similar circumstances.
have always professed my appreciation for the freedom I
am allowed here and the accumulation of diversity that that
freedom promotes. The flag fetish that you think I have
is simply my way of saying "thank you" to the ground that
I walk on every day.
don't yet worship the American flag, but if you slapped
the pattern on a pair of thigh high boots and the right
pair of legs there's no telling what I'd consider."
And you expressed
your feel for america, all the tables turned. So many non-religious
fools out there pledge fully to the anarchist movement.
I love america,
like an old grandmother who sits on her porch who greets
me with candy, and others with semi-automatic shotgun blasts.
perhaps in a way I am replacing religion with america, perhaps
Idea(l)s are what I worship, but you know, if those beliefs
give people like you the right to stand up to all of the
tanited hearts in this world and say "FUCK YOU" then damnit,
if there was a god, it would be you, and may the day come
taht you walk high and mighty above the people and make
all of those who oppose you burn before your eyes.lead on
bob, show us the heated light of truth, keep on revealing
the audacity of this religion bullshit. You have many followers,
and I alone shall stand forth and lead your armies of purity
across the lands of tainted hatred of truth!